After D got home from "almost running out of gas" (I say with a smile), he answered a few emails while I was suppose to be getting ready to work-out and to drive him into the office. Before I got up from the kithen table, I stumbled onto a Missions website. My heart has really been being tugged in this direction lately, so I've been really interested in hearing about other Mission expierences, esp. in Africa, where my heart has been guiding me lately. I found this website, which then took me to this article, called "Crying For My Poverty" written by a guy who went on a missions trip to Africa.
It was a real eye opener and I am just amazed at how much we can learn from the innocence and people in 3rd world countries. The article goes on saying how here in the United States, our wealth and greed is what tears us apart. It seperates us from God, and makes us focus more on pleasing people, materialistic things, money/success, etc. etc. How in a country where it's filled with so much poverty how they rely on God to provide. It's basics with them. Food, Shelter, Family, and Faith. I have been amazed by the transformation of people that go on Mission Trips to expierence what they have expierenced... they come back humbled. They come back "changed" and they come back with a bigger heart than what they ever imagined. This is Prossy... she lives in Uganda... isn't she absoutely beautiful?
and this is little Jane, who just lights up my face when I look at that precious face!
I truly feel that my heart is finding these stories, and I'm being "awakened" by all that goes on in this world outside of our daily lives. Not a day goes by where my heart doesn't think about the children in Uganda, the children in orphanges around the world, and about all those people out there that need help, in so many different ways. Ways that we sometimes take for granted. Simple things... like food, a home, health, clothes on our back, Love, and the hand of God to guide us through life. Before I stumbled onto the Amazima Website and heart the story of these children from one girl who I now admire more than she will ever know, I was blinded by this world. Sure, I knew of the problem... but I guess until you see it with your very own eyes and God touches your heart to make you *really* see, you never will really understand it. I told Susan the other day, D's sister, how I want to go to Africa. I want to make a difference somewhere, somehow... maybe just to hold a child who has never felt loved, or wanted... to be a witness of the love that Jesus has for us all. I'm telling you.... something has been stirred up in me over the last few months, I can't explain it. I think of these children all the time and my heart breaks for them.
SO.. all this to say, ignore my rantings and ravings sometimes. It only takes a moment for God to show me just how amazingly lucky and blessed that my life and the life of my children really is. If my only concerns for today is if D is going to run out of gas, or if my washing machine doesn't drain anymore... then really, I think I'm doing pretty darn good.
When a moment arises and I find myself either getting uptight about something trivial, or if an emotional "spell" from un-resolved issues with D stumbles upon me, I need to step back, hand it over to God, and realize just how little my problems really are.
I listen to 88.5, a Christian radio station all the time... today, after I worked out- song, after song of those "Are you listening?" worship songs played and when I pulled into my drive-way, I just sat in my car and listened, worshiped, and cried. My life is so blessed in so many ways, and I'm very thankful for all that I have.. right this very moment.
God is so good!
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